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Home > Archive > General Discussion > March 2002 > Just a little funny :-)
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Just a little funny :-)
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| CyberDude 2002-03-22, 1:59 pm |
| Hi guys and gals, I stumbled on this little item in another forum, and thought it would amuse you all, as it did me.
" If only a driver's license exam were as tough as a Microsoft exam. My drive to work would be easier! "
There would be far fewer drivers on the road and if you factor in the following!! he he he
I apologize in advance! ..... I can't resist ... :> ) Are you going to cyber arrest me??
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept
up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be
driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release
stating, "If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all
be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they painted new lines on the road, you would have to
buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the
windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows
before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause
your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you
would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought
"CarNT," but then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was
reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but it would only
run on five percent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would all
be replaced by a single "general protection fault" warning light.
8. The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.
9. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out
and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the antenna.
10.GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of
Rand McNally Road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they
neither need nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would
immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50 percent or more.
Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the
Justice Department.
11.Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn
to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate
in the same manner as the old car.
12. You'd have to press the "start" button to turn the system off!
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| cross36 2002-03-22, 2:10 pm |
| Yo Cyber lol, where did you pull this one from.
I do agree we need less crazy drivers out on our streets and highways. | |
| jombeewoof 2002-03-22, 2:23 pm |
| that's great | |
| eric1971 2002-03-22, 2:34 pm |
| So true. | |
| mrfixit 2002-03-22, 4:17 pm |
| Saw this about three or four years ago, and related to Win 95. LOL | |
| PotatoHead 2002-03-22, 7:18 pm |
| LOL - that's hilarious!! | |
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| eljefe79 2002-03-22, 11:42 pm |
| Ok since we're on the subject of Humor...I'll put in a shameless plug for Salmon Days at http://www.salmondays.tv which if you haven't heard is based on BOFH. The trailer's are pretty funny and had me giggling for most of the day and I think Docmeyer would definitely appreciate the content.
Meanwhile here's a contribution to tek comedy which left me ROTFLMAO.
Five cannibals get appointed as programmers in an IT company. During the welcoming ceremony, the boss says, "You're all
part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So don't
trouble the other employees." The cannibals promise not to trouble the other employees.
Four weeks later, the boss returns and says, "You're all working very hard, and I'm very satisfied with all of you. However, one of our cleaners has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?" The cannibals disavow all knowledge of the missing cleaner.
After the boss has left, the leader of the cannibals says to the others, "Which of you idiots ate the cleaner?"
A hand is hesitantly raised.
The leader of the cannibals says, "You fool! For four weeks we've been eating team leaders, managers, and project managers
so no one would notice anything, and you have to go and eat the cleaner!"
Best Giggles | |
| CyberDude 2002-03-23, 6:29 am |
| That is a good one. LOL |
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